Embrace You! Be Yourself

Okay. So, you’re significant other has called you out on your pretences. Now what? No relationship will work if you don’t be yourself and embrace who you truly are. A relationship is doomed for failure if you wear the Dateface. The beauty of God’s divine magnificence is that no two people are alike; celebrate and express your individuality. Be the best you, whatever that may be or look like.

If you don’t believe in yourself, who will, and why would you expect them to if you don’t believe in your own self-worth? Trying to be someone you’re not will only lead to unhappiness because it’s hard work to constantly wear someone else’s face.

If you’re young, don’t rush into a serious relationship. Take time to find yourself. Go to college, join the military, enjoy life! You can’t be true to yourself and any potential mates if you don’t know, understand, and accept who you are.

Everything in life is a choice with consequences. Even though friends and family will try to guide you and keep from repeating their mistakes, there’s nothing like trial and error to learn the lessons of life. Nobody’s perfect and there’s always room for personal growth.

You can’t be yourself if you’re constantly worried about how other people view you. Who cares what people think? Other people’s perception of you is important in some instances, but not all; for instance, in the workforce. Trying to please everyone is impossible because people have different tastes and opinions, so hang around people who like the flavor you are.

What other people think of you doesn’t matter, as long as you do unto others as you would have them do unto you, and you take into consideration the person’s motives for expressing their thoughts about you and your actions. Being yourself doesn’t mean not caring about other’s feelings. Don’t be rude and belittle other people that have different views from you. Everybody’s individuality is equally important. Also, even though other people’s perception of you doesn’t matter, you need to be aware of how others perceive you. You live in society and have to interact and act in socially acceptable ways. If being yourself can be misinterpreted you need to be aware of it, and learn to adapt to socially acceptable behavior when appropriate. There’s a time and place for everything. Even though you need to be yourself, that doesn’t mean there’s no room for self-improvement, which can bring changes in your personality.
Sometimes being true to yourself involves changing yourself for the better.
Relax and don’t take yourself too seriously. Nobody’s perfect.

Don’t hide your true feelings and opinions. Why would you do that to yourself or others? It will only lead to heartbreak, betrayal, and hurt feelings. If you are ashamed or insecure about aspects of your personality, there’s no point in trying to hide it; the truth always comes out.

How to Cope with the Battered

Domestic violence can cause depression, anxiety, panic attacks, substance abuse, posttraumatic stress disorder, and suicide attempts. Children that are exposed to domestic violence can develop aggressive behavior, mental disorders, developmental problems, school problems, and low self-esteem.

Many survivors of abuse do not need mental health treatment; they’re issues may resolve after they leave the abusive relationship and they are safe, along with their children.

If you have a family member or friend who is being emotionally or physically abused, help them get out of the situation the best way you can.

• Show your concern – help them recognized what is going on and explain that their relationship is not normal and that they deserve a healthy, non-violent relationship.
• Be supportive – help them realize the abuse is not their fault and that they are not alone; be a good listener, they need someone to believe and listen to them. Help them develop a safety plan and encourage them to seek professional counseling or support groups. Encourage them to participate in outside activities. If the finally leave the situation, they’ll need your strength and moral support more than ever because they’ll feel sad and lonely and need time to mourn the relationship.
• Don’t judge – respect their decisions to stay in the abusive relationship no matter how stupid it seems to you; they have their reasons; don’t criticize.

How to Cope with Batterers

It’s not possible to cope with Batterers. You must leave the person and the relationship for your personal safety, as well as your loved ones. Physical violence can escalate to the murder of you and your children and family. The cycle of violence must end.

• Make sure you and your children are safe. Find a safe place to live like a safe house or home of a friend or relative. Take house keys, money, and important papers with you.
• Call the police if you are in danger and think you can’t leave home safely, or you want to bring charges against your abuser.
• Get medical and counseling help. Your doctor can treat any medical problem, provide support, and make referrals. A safe house, nurse, social worker, therapist, psychiatrist, and other health care professionals can help you find counseling and support groups.
• Talk to someone you trust. Get support from family, friends, coworkers, or spiritual advisors.
• Get a personal protection order and legal support. A staff member at a safe house can help you file for protection.
• Make a safety plan.

People may not know your situation. Don’t let anybody talk you into actions that may not be right for you; however, until you leave the abusive relationship, make sure to protect your personal safety.

• E-mail – like a postcard, e-mail can be intercepted or lost.
• The Internet – computers can be monitored without you even knowing it. A computer’s history is never really completely erased.
• Cell Phones – cell phones can be monitored.
• GPS – global positioning systems can be placed on your car, in your purse, or in your cell phone.
• Court records – some courts are placing records online and may contain personal information.

How to Cope with Demeaners

It may not be possible to cope with Demeaners. If a Demeaner won’t agree to relationship counseling or anger management, you must leave the person and the relationship for your emotional safety. The Demeaner is the one who needs to face their psychological issues, not you.

How to Leave a Broken Relationship

If you are in an abusive relationship, it is vital to your emotional and physical well-being to leave.

Boozers and Other Substance Abusers

(coming soon)

Stalking

• Repeatedly harassed you and made you feel scared or upset.
• Bothered you with unwanted attention like phone calls, gifts, letters, or following you to work or home.
• Threatened your family.